BOC Minutes 1/13/16

Hey Team,

Welcome back to Camp Bates semestre nùmero dos!

After spending all last semester on the campaign trail, I’ll now assume my Minute Maid duties.

A smidge of housekeeping…

Proceed to pour one out.

Favorite roll call answers to “Least likely New Year’s Resolution to Succeed” interspersed.

Without further ado… here are your minutes.


After several Jews fail to blow the meeting shofar, Callum “goy” Douglass lets ‘er rip.

Julia “Supreme Chancellor of the Carrabasset” Savage assumes the presidential loft and greets all heartily.


Nate “Out of Africa” Diplock – 8 o’clock tonight, AESOP 2016 (canigetawutwut) meeting. If you missed it, no worries! There’s still time to get your shit together. Probably. Maybe.


Callum – Stripping the wall, because it’s been putting in work and looks good nekkid. Counts as a work trip!

Squasha – Winter carnival arts crawl event? Ice skating? Movie? Brainstorm! Email Grandmaster Sash with bright ideas.

Dana – Chill Brostie i.e. Phil Dostie (Geo Lab Tech among other things) has approached the BOC concerning organizing a welding class at New England School of Metalwork. Gauging interest at the moment. Prices to be negotiated, but looking at $200-$280 for a weekend, planning, designing, and forging a camp knife. Email if interested. Tell yo franz.

Sophia “I’ve seen most of most of you” Thayer – High-res naked calendars if you’re looking to get scenicly aroused while checking the date. Several still available, $5 per calendar, 2 for $10 if you ask nicely.

Become new head of Sinaloa Cartel. 

‘Cause you use me up

Savagery – Next week, winter carnival! Much help needed! Many hands make light work, so pull your weight! Eyeballs out for an email with sign-ups.

Rough schedule:

Night skiing at San Fernando Valley, 5-7pm Tuesday.

Skill n Grill – build a ski jump behind 280, send it, get nekkid, tunes, grill burgers n stuff. (Wednesday?)

Wind down Thursday in the little room, 10:30pm – winter themed karaoke (I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus…)

Friday is puddle jump! Woo! Also, something about 24 hours and lemonade… what was it? I forget. Whatever. Torch run from the lean-to in Greene to campus, start training!

Tentative events

Whisperlite Iron Chef

Ice-skating on the puddle

Dan Willsey – CHC side of organization also needs help, let us not neglect our brothers n sisters in frosty crime.

Also Dan Willsey – Sneak peak at t-shirts at the meeting! Editorial: they’re dope. 5$. Shall be sold throughout Winter Carnival by the BOC

Obama and Biden – Directors meeting tomorrow night 7pm.

Refrain from purchasing another bike


 Alex “hucked the jump naked at skill n grill once” Moskovitz – Van to Sunday River on Saturday, hop on his email quickly and get up there to shred.

Callum – 1st beginner ice-climbing trip this Saturday. Chill. heh

Jordan Kargle – Intro winter fun sesh, including tutorials on doing ice and snow things like climbing, winter hiking, winter camping, quinzees, etc. Basically, how to have fun outside even if it’s cold i.e. your best bet for battling chronic seasonal depression.

Pardo – Noon Friday skiing, also Pardo will be skiing with his snowblades. Late night shred. Look for email in the past.

Nate – Snow blades are missing from the E-room. Uproarious laughter tinged with tension directed at the space between Nate and Pardo ensues.

Ben – Gauging interest on Nordic potential beginning Nordic lessons? Also look for email in the past.

Dan – Sunday Rivah round high noon today, 2-3 spots in the whip. Look for email that has once again been sent.

Lose my SWUG status. George, you’ve been a SWUG since you got here.

Sashay – Camping at the lean-to! Tuesday evening, back for 8ams.


Callum proposes toe bails, unanimous except for that guy. This shall improve the efficacy of our crampons. Yay for efficacy.


Matthew – In New Zealand, went into the forest on the South Island. Decided to search for an error on the map –> searched for a while, decided to stop because they were not accomplishing much. Tried to continue with what they wanted to do, but were lost already. Matt was leading, had a decision to make. Should he go back or go forward. They kept going cuz fuck it. Tryna find a hill, which just kept going up. Eventually stopped, reassessed, still completely lost. Kept going, cuz, you know, fuck it. At this point, someone had sprained an ankle and Matt had hypothermia. Surprise camping b/c lost, lighters got wet –> no hot dinner. 400m too high, 2000m from intended campsite. 4 people in a 3-man tent. In the morn, very cold tent breakdown –> Matt got hypothermia again. Blacked out. Blacked in. Continued. Was supposed to have tent-poles, but wasn’t sure because blacked out. Check in at a camp so as not to trigger search party. At camp, Matt was very sad. Brick feet. Matt- “Did you pack the tent poles?” Group – “wut”. Turns out Matt packed tent poles! Noice. All’s well that ends well. No one got hurt except for hypothermia twice and sprained ankle.

Jordan – Impromptu road trip to CO, skiing n shit. Hitch-hiked back up a pass over break. Super sketch, 12 people in the back of an F-150. Just hanging onto the cord at the back of the tailgate, at one point Kurt had him by the hood. Also, just hanging onto a loose snowboard. Made up to the pass.

Watch less shitty tv

Julia also got lost backpacking in a forest in NZ. Hiking through a swamp with JJ, very high mud. No orange trail-markers for a while. Wading through the middle of the swamp for several hours. Found a river, followed it out to a road. Made it out eventually. Continued to travel with JJ, kept losing trail. In conversation, turns out he got kicked out of airforce academy for being color-blind. “What colors can’t you see?” “Mostly orange”. Julia decides to lead at this point. 2 days later, way up in the alpine zone. JJ made the call to go down a certain trail. Was taking a while, getting dark. Julia realized she had to hike down the road a long ass time. Walking down the road, JJ said it was 5 km. Will catch a ride eventually. She continues down, getting dark, ice on the road. Turns out, Borland Rd closed for winter. Road is gated shut. Finally get to the the road, 10:30 at night. A car pulls up behind her. Had pretty much lost it at this point. Either gonna kill her or offer her a ride. Kiwi – “I think I have someone you know”! JJ pops out. “Oh! Hi!” Walked an extra 13 miles that day. Made it home safe.

Daisy – NOLS course in Brooks Range of Alaska, bear country. Safety courses taken serious. Years before, some kids got mauled because not taking bear protocols seriously.  Independent group expeditions at the end. 16 years old, just said bye to leaders to go on solos. “There’s a bear over there”. 2 cubs = mama bear nearby “Hey bear, we see you”. This is how to talk to a bear. Up on hind legs, almost charged. Bears were just curious. They ran away super fast up mountain

Hannah – Summer in Boston, decided to go out, drove to a park. Trail run, print a map, laminated, full thinga water, ready to go. Eventually ran outta time, thought she was following the perimeter trail, was following wrong trail. Sun gonna set around 7:30, asked a lady on the road, how do I get to the parking lot? “Oh, you’re not even close.” Decided to cut back in, cut across. Road is far away, doesn’t exactly know where, dude comes outta the woods with two dogs. Kinda sketch. Do know where we are? “You could go this way or this way, you’re like 5 miles away.” She was super tired, began to walk away…both look back, “OK you have two options”. You could take the way back, or my car is right over there. Sketchy situation either way. He has two daughters, she gets in the car, he starts talking about his dogs and daughters. Thanks mysterious man with dogs. Moral of the story: “don’t fuck up”.  

Sweet, dunners.

Happy Bates,

Scuba steve